We're not Nuts, We're Screwed!

Have you ever lived through a near death experience. A “gripping the steering wheel, your car is on two wheels, and a semi truck is peeling the paint off the other side of your car” type situation?

After the adrenaline runs its course along with some freshly externalized bodily fluid, you are suddenly overcome with laughter, uncontrollable laughter. Have you ever been there? 

I have.

In that blessed moment, It's good to be alive. No, it's absolutely joyous to be among the living! You would be elated at the thought of a migraine headache because it's so awesome to be alive!

A mere eight minutes to the next rest stop on the road, and we've already forgotten just how wonderful it is to be a sentient being. Yes, no longer is a respiring, masticating, ovulating, or (whatever the male equivalent is) -ing human of the pre-expiration persuasion all things good in the world.

Now, you just need to change your pants. It's cold outside the car, your warm increasingly odoriferous car.  The restrooms looks menacingly dark and adult bookstore dirty, and there's a line. Not just any line, a Soviet era waiting for toilet paper sort of line. You have to stand at the end of this cue as each newcomer asks the same predictable question,”What's with the pants, dude?”

You muddled through some pathetic lie about your daughter's birthday. You don't care if they believe you, and that's for the best because they don't.

A measly eight miles earlier, you were dancing with the angels in the Presence of The Almighty while looking at the world and asking, ”What shall we do with this ball?”

Now, you're reduced to this considerably marginalized position of ignoring hushed rude comments and the obligatory snickers which follow happening right behind your back.

For one brief moment, simply having the next moment of life brought you sudden and profound Enlightenment. Satori!

But now, here, you're best hand at the poker table, your all in moment at the casino, and some freshly-fallen angel holds sway over the turn of the next card. Despair!

I had just such a situation after the results of the 2016 Presidential election were announced.

Thank God Hillary is not our Chief Executive for the next four years. Yes, praise Him for His Hand of Protection over America! Thank you for being this beings God! I am delighted with laughter. I verge on dancing naked before the Lord. I felt like Solomon in all his Wisdom. Satori!

But now, here I realize… Trump! 

Soiled pants. 

Dirty, dark restroom.
Long line.
Snickers.
This sucks!
God help us.
What is that smell

An afterthought:

After sharing such celestial and humiliating experiences with you, I feel there should be some Aesop's Fables moral to this story, and fortunately my feelings haven't led me astray...

America has spoken through her election process: 

"When given only two options, we will prefer the inept over the malevolent."

Hopefully, this will be counted to us as Righteousness. 

A *Wink* to the DPRK

That's not a wink, he's just squinting.

If there was ever a nation on the modern globe which begged for régime change it's the Democratic (👈hilarious!) People's Republic of North Korea (AKA: DPRK). Washington's demagogues obsess over the DPRK's nuclear program because it might hurt people, but the "Home of the Free" (👈hilarious, too!) takes no concrete action1 to protect the millions of people who were and continue to be exterminated under the cloven hoof of the Kim dynasty since 1948. Instead, the business end  of the Arsenal of Democracy (👈chuckle!) has focused on the likes of Saddam Hussein, Muammar Gaddafi, Bashar al-Assad, and a cast of comparative “Vienna Boy's Choir” voices in the authoritarian régime chorus. This strikes me as disingenuous since we proclaim, promote, and propagate the premise that U.S.military intervention in any given country is prompted to secure the freedom of a repressed people because that's just how magnanimous we are.

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A sense of relative value

Maybe my cynicism waxes melodramatic. There exists the possibility that the people of the DPRK actually love the prospects of living under a draconian state of surveillance, forced isolation, fictional virtues, fabricated history, excessive military spending at a cost of widespread famine, extermination, murder, enslavement, ad hoc justice, torture, imprisonment, rape, forced abortions, and sexual violence (I used the short list) make up a typical day in this Southeast Asian neighborhood. There is the possibility that this barbarity is how human beings should treat one another and allow one another to be treated by others. Yes, maybe the “Dear Leader, who is a perfect incarnation of the appearance that a leader should have” (👈swallows own tongue laughing) lived up to his onerous title and I am but a wrong thinking enemy of the people. Maybe.

We have Disneyland and they operate secretive prison camps where perceived opponents of the government are sent to face torture and abuse, starvation rations, and forced labor (the quaint little institution we used to call "slavery").
 

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Amazing dude, huh?

To each their own, I suppose. It's not like we in the “Condo of the Free” (👈giggle) would operate some secretive prison camp on an island ninety miles south of Florida where prisoners are detained without recourse to the law and deprived of their Creator endowed certain unalienable Rights, right? (👈Smirk) That would be intolerable to our American sensibilities because we are totally different from the despotic North Koreans. Different like when the Mafia runs a rigged numbers racket it's a criminal social blight called "Gambling", but when the state runs the same racket it's fun for the entire family called "Gaming" (👈 Damn funny). 

Yup, we're totally different. 
God bless America. 
Amen! 

No matter, if the people of North Korea ever want real hope and change, all they need do is exercise their Second Amendment Rights and overthrow their Beloved Leader just like we advised the Iraqi people do with Saddam. If they were to somehow be bamboozled out of that precious God given Right of self defense (👈Ridiculous!) then all the happy go lucky folks in the DPRK need do is give Pyongyang’s Juche Tower a little makeover...

BEFORE

AFTER

We'll be there directly.
Guaranteed! 
That's just how magnanimous we are.
*Wink*

Footnote:

1 - Concrete Action as opposed to Paper Action, such as:

• Paper writing
• Paper shuffling
•  Paper towel drying your hands after washing them clean of the massacre
•  Paper filing
•  Paper reciting
•  Paper deal making
•  Paper reading 
• Paper tiger origami
• Paper wiping your ass with the Constitution

That's what we do when it comes to freedom, it's window dressing, just rhetoric and feel good resolutions because we don't really believe in the principles and ideals this nation was founded upon.

Grim Facts...

...every American should know.